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Love Affairs: The Inside Look

Relationships are emotional roller coaster rides filled with the traditional fast paced linear roads, the exhilarating dips and twists, keeping you on a constant thrill. This thrill allows us to hold on and fight for what we believe is rightfully ours. What happens when you find yourself on a roller coaster ride that is already in progress?

As women, we are naturally creatures of emotion, no matter how neurotic or calm we may seem, a majority of us are ticking time bombs waiting to be detonated. The reaction is usually the same when finding that we are being cheated on, we shout, we cry, sometimes we just leave the relationship all together. However, mostly we get angry and blame the other woman. The thing is we are not taking time to see the bigger issue here, your spouse is the issue! I’m going to give you the other woman’s view.

If a woman is constantly going after your spouse, with continuing persistence, you can believe that she is looking at you like “the problem.” She believes that if you weren’t in the picture they could be together happily. But why does she feel this way? Simply, because your spouse is making her believe that she is everything. Her head is being filled with sweet nothings and glass ceilings of a love that can’t be because your spouse doesn’t want to hurt you. (Because you know he’s so considerate of your feelings.)

The fact is that you can’t really get angry with her. I take pity on her. In most cheating situations the cheater won’t leave their spouse because there genuinely is a bond between the couple. Maybe the couple is going through a rough patch, maybe there’s a lack of fire. Whatever the situation remember this, the “other woman” is more likely to be just as in love as you are and the only one at fault is your spouse. Trying to solve your problem by bashing and fighting her won’t do any good and it will be everlasting because she will be ready to fight.

Ultimately, you know your relationship better than anyone else if you can forgive them find a compromise and continue to ride the roller coaster find ways to bring back that fire, maybe spontaneity in the bedroom will work. Regardless, resolve the issue with your spouse and no one else, the other woman doesn’t need to see you sweat it will only satisfy her in the long run.

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Macielle Betances

Community and Promotions Director

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